Tales of a Double Virgo

Episode #22

(22 is my number!! i hope this episode rocks!)

the root

 

they say money is the root of all evil.

who is this ‘they’ anyway?

and root of all evil? hmmmmm.

  1. money is not evil. money is paper. paper made by us. it’s not really real, tho a very persistent illusion.
  2. and evil? what IS evil?

evil

adjective \ˈē-vəl

Definition of evil for English Language Learners

  • : morally bad

  • : causing harm or injury to someone

  • : marked by bad luck or bad events

 

when i stare at ‘evil’ for a bit, it starts to look like it’s not spelled right.

funny that it is LIVE backwards.

the concept of ‘morally bad’ can be defined in so many ways.

what is ‘morally bad’ for one

is surely NOT for another.

and who gets to choose what is morally bad?

it’s a belief. a judgment.

 

this may begin to dip in to the territory i have been pondering this week so far

based on a quote by Natalie Goldberg.

‘Write what disturbs you, what you fear, what you have not been willing to speak about. Be willing to be split open.’

fuck.

as much as i have avoided doing that

it just keeps coming up.

 

back on track.

 

i also found this:

Money. definition. 

Anything of value that serves as a (1) generally accepted medium of financial exchange, (2) legal tender for repayment of debt, (3) standard of value, (4) unit of accounting measure, and (5) means to save or store purchasing power. 

Anything of value?

that’s interesting.

 

if anything of value is the root of all morally bad things

that doesn’t make much sense.

and

if money = anything of value

then i can think of a hell of a lot more things more valuable than green paper.

 

what about the reasons people do morally f’ed up things for money?

how does that money ultimately make us/them feel?

powerful? free? important?

 

if money grew on the trees in my yard

in endless supply

what would i do? how would i feel?

 

well, i’d for sure pick some daily.

i’d be sure to water and compost and love on those trees

because they are producing something valuable.

but am i treating them any differently than the current trees in my yard?

nope.

 

what if we poured our love and attention

in to all things of value.

how would that affect our lives?

and if those valuable things = money

wouldn’t we all be limitlessly abundant?

 

hmmm.

now on to the things that disturb me. what i fear and am not willing to speak about.

oh man

i’ll prob piss some people off

but i’m getting pretty good at that.

not because i want to

but because i can’t sacrifice how i feel for my dislike of conflict anymore.

 

there. i said it.

i totally freaking avoid conflict.

it used to be AT ALL COSTS.

 

now

i’m stirring the pot more than i’d like to

but grinning and bearing it

doesn’t cut it any more.

 

what disturbs me?

the fact that so many women have their babies unnecessarily cut out of them

by a cold instrument.

pulled from a warm womb

to be strapped in a plastic seat

with a plastic thing-y to suck on.

 

babies need the squeeze of the Vag to welcome them in to the world

and

the arms of their people to be cradled by.

 

and

we ‘elected’ a pussy grabbing hater to lead us in to the age of Aquarius

and

so many have zero self awareness and go around blaming everyone else for their OWN CREATION!

and

people kill wolves with a hard on and total disregard for the families they are destroying

and

we think it’s ok to dump our shit all over the earth in the name of profit and business

and

we inject poison in to our babies

and consume it all the time in our crappy food system

and

we kill elephants for their tusks

and

we think horrible thoughts about ourselves and those we claim to love

and

and

and

what do i fear?

i fear that sharing what i really feel about all of it

will turn all of you against me.

 

what am i not willing to talk about?

we don’t talk about religion or politics.

but maybe the pussy grabbing hater is the SHOCK

that we need to wake us the FUCK UP!

the last stand of the patriarchy.

it has to go out with a BANG.

 

i honestly lean in to trust and hope

so much that i surprise myself.

i know that i am always doing my part

and

that’s the best i can do for all that is.

there really is a Grand Plan

and fear

is not invited.

tho it will try like hell to crash the party.

 

i may feel disturbed about our behavior

but i still believe in human kind.

i may have fears that you will hate me

and that i’ll feel even more alone

but i say it anyway.

i may not talk about god and republicans

cause deep down

i know we all play a part.

 

the root.

the real root to all of this madness

is the total DisConnection from who we really are.

the need for power for freedom for recognition

can be satiated by directing the focus inward.

 

true power really does live within

live = evil backwards

true freedom exists in the mind

freedom = valuable = money = freedom

recognition can be found when we allow our true selves to step forward

regardless of what anyone will think

recognition = allowing who we are to live our lives

 

then we realize

that the most valuable thing

is the freedom we find

Living our Lives

as our Truest Selves

and

anything other than this

is the root of all pain and suffering.

so maybe the real definition of Evil is:

living a life of UNtruth

<or not true to oneself>

which may be the most morally bad deed of them all.

 

shine your light no matter what.

shine your light no matter what.