open to it

Tales of a Double Virgo

Episode #47

open to it

 

open to what?

you ask.

what is IT?

 

IT is the stuff within you

that stops you in your tracks

that cock blocks your progress

that sucks away your confidence

that makes you:

doubt

fear

resist

……..

 

you know

your ISSUES.

 

don’t look away.

look IN.

 

sooooo

some of MY issues are UP.

well

they are often up

and

often i look away.

sometimes run

sometimes medicate.

 

in the midst

of this current round

i read something

somewhere

‘Open to them.’

 

Open to them??!

yes i’ve heard that

in one form or another

over and over and over and over and over and over

tho

this time

light bulb.

aha!

 

they have been

a knockin’

for eons.

& i would mostly

usually

say

‘not available. go away.’

 

this time

i opened my arms

‘welcome! gosh, you’ve been trying to reach me for EVER!

come on in. let’s have a cup of tea.’

notice i didn’t say

‘fuck off. i’m gonna make a cocktail.’

 

instead of looking away

running

screaming NOOOOOOOOOO!

i welcomed them IN for a visit.

maybe not a hug……yet.

tho perhaps soon.

 

what are the ITS within YOU?

what feelings rise up around certain people

or

during certain situations?

our ‘it(s)’

tend to be quite known

AND

familiar

even IF we don’t give them the time of day.

they lurk.

awaiting the perfect condition

to swell

and

rise

and

sometimes

ERUPT

up and out.

and sometimes just up

to be swallowed

before the out.

 

gulp.

 

‘they’ really aren’t as scary as they might seem.

the scary part

comes from years and years and sometimes lifetimes

of denial

or

resistance.

 

like that almost eaten peach that rolled under your seat

to be found by your wandering hand

months later

ew.

or

that sandwich

in that ziplock

swelled with microbial activity

fuzzy beyond belief.

 

IT lives inside of us

and

IT needs some fucking air

aka: acknowledgment. acceptance. & and eye to eye conversation.

<ps. IT can’t text>

 

eventually

the volcanic explosion of ITS

will calm to a rumble

and

IT won’t feel like imminent death.

 

Open To IT

and

See What You Are REALLY Made Of.

 

not that you are made of it

tho perhaps shaped by it.

what form would you take

withOUT

IT?